The Dire Cafe

Let Me Tell You About My Paladin

Hank Harwell

This is a new one for me

In the three years I lived in South Carolina, I never heard about the Lizard Man, but apparently, he's back....

http://www.wistv.com/global/Story.asp?s=7948448

http://www.wistv.com/Global/story.asp?S=7978464&nav=menu36_2

Tags: cryptids

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Someone should organize a convention for all the humanoid cryptids like the Lizard Man, the Moth Man, the Owl Man, Sasquatch, etc. Get them a room at the Dubuque Marriott, a few plates of Ritz crackers with a tiny triangle of ham on them... Nametags, of course.

So he lives in a swamp? Way to play into the media stereotypes, Lizard Man.

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Lizard Man, the Moth Man, the Owl Man, Sasquatch

Ya know that sounds like a C-List superhero convention.

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Ooh, a second string superhero team where everyone has a cryptid theme. I like. And the punchline is that they're so undistinguished and obscure that everytime the team shows up to help someone they hear, "Wait, you guys are real?"

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Lead by the mysterious alien Mr. Grey and with the help of their faithful pet, Nessie, The Crime-busting Cryptids struggle to make the city of Dubuque safe while maintaining their secret identity as one of the premiere jam bands on the community college concert circuit.

In today's episode Moth Man tries to find a place to refuel their haunted flying saucer/VW bus hybrid.

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The mothman's name isn't Arthur, is it?

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SPOOOOON!

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I would like to do a television 'reality' show along these lines, sort of a cross between Destination Truth and Crocodile Hunter. The premise is that the crew goes out to investigate some minor mystery, such as reports of a rare grasshopper in the area that was thought to be extinct. Then, the Loch Ness Monster blocks their shot, then Bigfoot (their sound guy) drops the mike... The host treats the cryptids as commonplace, even as he or she gets excited over the rare bug or whatever.

In another episode, the team is investigating strange sounds heard from an island. It turns out to just be Lizard Man listening to the radio too loud.

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